One fine day, an alien spaceship just landed on its home planet, !@#&%!&@#$???. A native alien reported what it had spied to their leader.
Leader : !@#*($^!@*#^
Alien : !@*#^*!$$*#@^*%
Oh sorry.. here's the translation.
Leader : Report what you have spied of Earth
Alien : Here goes.
1. People are obsessed about love. They speak of everlasting love, worship this love, talk of that love, promise of undying love, yet when they see another man lying on the floor wounded or weak from starvation, all they did was say 'Fuck' and get lost without helping.
2. People are vain. They spend a lot on their appearance. Leaders might need appearance, but local people who don't have need for looks, say, a Chinese businessman who runs a grocery shop is as handsome as Brad Pitt ( ok, he is just an example, may not be handsome to everybody. let's just say he looks good ). The same man has skin smoother than a woman's, hands more delicate than a delicate hand, and just acts so gentle. Out of place. So out of place.
3. Their leaders are power hungry crazed people. They rant on endlessly about world peace, but they bomb each other given half an opportunity. Politics seem to overcome passion for life.
4. People are almost without a mind of their own. The moment a bright individual starts something new, a novelty, expect the world to mimic him within two weeks. Then, he creator is forgotten.
5. There appear to be so many experts in so many fields. They report of useless stuff everyday and try to look wise and erudite, while what they are doing plays no significant in people's life. ( example would be the health reports. One moment this expert say that eating soy is good for health, with no ill effects, another pops up and says soy causes cancer, another comes up saying soy is good for health, but over a long time will cause erectile dysfunction in man, and another pops up and say soy is bad with no sign of goodness, and another comes up and says soy causes mutation and so on. But does that change anything? Some people eat soy, some people don't eat, and they all die )
6. Hypocrisy is a widely and well practised art
7. People are addicted to sex and porn. And they behave so differently towards this topic. Westerners are very open about it, SOME just go around and approach people and ask *want to fuck?*. And then the Chinese will stand up and say Westerners are doing it so wrongly and begin by saying that wrong sexual position practised by Westerners cause health problems as it disrupts which nerve which nerve. Westerners counter by saying 'We have antibiotics don't worry'. Japanese stands up and say 'We have made a machine to solve that problem'. Indian sits down, keeps quiet and does it the most.
8. People are strange. Women demand gender equality. Men, who had been the dominant gender, had to yield after much protests and demonstration by the womenfolk. After some period, men face extinction of manliness. Chivalry is dead. Women suffer as well, as they demand manliness in the man they want. More sissies are born everyday, spoilt by their parents and cannot take suffering ( like me, but considering my position, that appears to be fairly good already ) Men squeal now. More women remaining single. Strange strange indeed.
9. Money is the most important factor in everything. Just give money, and they swear undying fealty to you. As long as you still have money to give them.
10. People are being educated into a stereotyped style of thinking. Many are brainwashed into thinking that the perfect life is study hard from the age of 3 to 25, slog guts out to earn money while having as little babies yet as much sex as possible from 23 to 60, then get mistreated by kids until they die after retirement. This is the trend of the world now. Yet true knowledge doesn't exist.
11. People are touchy about religion. They yell 'racism' at every quarter of opportunity given, even at the slightest hint of religious issues touched. That will be followed by a heated argument, then open feelings of anger from one religion to another. Who can say which is right and which is wrong? Because that is unanswerable, violence became the answer.
12. People are power obsessed. Nothing changes a human like power. Yet they fear death. Power no longer means duty. It means luxury and the perfect excuse to order people to serve their every whim.
13. People talk of advancements. But to what direction is unclear. They want to excel in technology and knowledge, yet they don't know how vast the space is, or where God is. They just want to advance for their own pleasure. Never once have they looked back down at the soil they are standing on, how much destruction they have caused in their fervor and greed in a rampage for advancements. THEN they start campaigning to save the Earth, while the other half finds it fun to go against the activists and continues killing animals and driving them to extinction while destroying as much forests as they could in the meantime. Many people feel life meaningless, suicide and murder not uncommon. Neither is violence.
Conclusion. We don't have to conquer Earth as it is not worth it. They will destroy themselves sooner or later.
Leader : You have done well.
I am not saying I am so wise or things like that. It's just that these kind of stuff just makes me feel.. aaah.. sien. The world is going to the dogs, literally. Just saw it in the news today. The Chinese have a new trend. After their pet died, the pet will be worshipped in the same fashion as they would worship their late ancestors. Hell notes for dead dogs? Go figure. If they have money, why not help out other countries that are so poor that a month's salary for a man is worth two eggs or a carton of milk, but no, political issues, there are limits to what a country can do for others, and there are records, paperwork and so on that hampers every attempt to help. Then people just say 'FUCK IT I AM NOT HELPING IF IT TAKES SO MUCH FUSS'
Ain't it true? I have many questions unanswered, and I need answers.