I am being Cantonese-ed. I mean seriously, my cantonese still suck like fuck, but I am beginning to get used to the language.
Today in BP, I was at a coffee shop, when an old lady came and take our orders.
"Ai Lim simik?" ---> ( Hokkien for 'Want drink what?' )
"Yao meh sui?" ---> ( I asked. Cantonese for 'Got what drinks?' )
Old lady : '_'
Old lady : -_-
Old lady : '_'????????????????????
Damn it.
_____________________________________________________________
My computer is seriously going. It is crashing every 1-40 minutes.
And I just bought a new wireless optical mouse for my laptop. Funny thing is, it costs RM50. Ok that's not funny. Funnier thing is, it runs on AA batteries. WTF.
_____________________________________________________________
I am extremely fucked. Apparently I just realized one thing. With friendster merging stupid comments and stupid testimonials as one feature.. I am getting 'cut-copy-paste-' testimonials/comments.
Argh, the agony of watching camwhorers posting me testimonials that read 'With this testimonial, I send you my love, friendship forever ^^ :P :D ;) '
I say FUCK YOU! Friendship forever? Fuck we hardly talk online/reality! Fuck we hardly meet anymore/NEVER MEET BEFORE. Fuck you!!!!!!!!!!
_______________________________________________________________
Called a senior about INTEC.
From his description, its sounds more like a non-military education-based national service.
"You get a bed, a locker and a table, and share the apartment-dorm like room with 5 other people."
Fuck. Its a half day walk to the nearest KTM from there. And I hate buses.
________________________________________________________________
Back to nonsense.
Zhi Wei tagged me with some stupid thing. I suppose I am free enough to do it.
5 Things found in your bag
1. Smelly smell
2. Looky look
3. Heary hear
4. Tasty taste
5. feely feel
That answer your question?
5 Things found in your purse/wallet
1. Money
2. My Pictures
3. No Money
4. My cards
5. Nothing
5 Favourite things in your room
1. Big Bed
2. Thick Bed
3. Big Blanket
4. Thick Blanket
5. Lots of hot women in bikinis lying on my bed
5 Types of humans
1. Those who worship me
2. Those who do not worship me
3. Those that eat potatoes
4. Those that do not eat potatoes
5. Those that looks like pandas
5 Things you've always wanted to do
1. Eat
2. Sleep
3. Play
4. Shit
5. Fuck around like an asshole
5 Things you're currently into
1. Into water
2. Toilet
3. Penguins
4. Pandas
5. Potatoes
5 People you tag
1. Any kind sound who is stupid enough to do this 1 ( Me excluded )
2. Any kind sound who is stupid enough to do this 2
3. Any kind sound who is stupid enough to do this 3
4. Any kind sound who is stupid enough to do this 4
5. Any kind sound who is stupid enough to do this 5
---
1) Name one person who made you smile last night.
- Myself
2) What were you doing at 8:00 this morning?
- I think I was sleeping, dreaming about how rich I was, and dreaming having the entire world worshipping me.
3) What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
- Reading this stupid survey in Zhi Wei's blog, and nudging Aimee
4) What was something that happened to you in 2006?
- Everything
5) What is the last thing you said aloud?
- WAH WTF!?
6) How many different things did you drink today?
- Potato Juice
7) What color is your hairbrush?
- FUCK YOU LAR! Want laugh at my hair that is not grown back yet is it? FUCK YOU!
8) What was the last thing you paid for?
- Erm, KKKL bus ticket to KL. Sounds nice.
9) Where were you last night?
- Toilet
10) What color is your front door?
- This is an interesting rhetorical question. It can answer everything in the universe, and explain creation.
Brown....................NOT!
11) Where do you keep your change?
- Under the toilet bowl
12) What is the weather like today?
- Weather is weather. What you want me say? Its sick? Its healthy? Its fucking around and producing bad weathers????? Or its fucking around and its happy and we get good weathers?? I say fuck weather.
13) What is the best ice cream flavor?
- Potato.
14) What is something you are excited about?
- I am excited about.. come to think of it.. I am so apathetic I don't actually care -_-
15) Do you want to cut your hair?
- OI! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH HOR! KEEP LAUGHING AT MY HAIR ONLY MAFUCKERS!
16) Are you over the age of 25?
- 1 + 8 = 9. 2 + 5 = 7. 9 is over 7. Yes I am over 25 you idiot asking stupid question.
17) Do you talk a lot?
- I don't talk. I enlighten.
18) Do you watch The O.C.?
- What the hell is that.
19) Do you know anyone named Steven?
- I know 3 of them. I can see no relevance in this question to anything, unless the person who created this questionnaire is a guy who happens to be a homosexual with a fetish for guys named Steven. Yes I know people named Steven.
20) Do you make up your own words?
- Nejo Maka Owna Wada. Nejo genuisa. RIDIPULITAKA!
21) Are you typically a jealous person?
- I am jealous that there is someone out there who is jealous of me but i don't know who
22) Name a friend whose name starts with the letter “A”
- uh.. Aimee?
23) Name a friend whose name starts with the letter “K”
- Kanasai. I think.. erm.. Kumaran?
24) Who’s the 1st person on your received calls list?
- Mum. She called me to hang up on me. Nah just joking.
25) What did the last text message you received say?
- Damn private ok. Ok lar, let you know lar.
"Yes can wear jeans but not on Mondays" - Phang Jim
26) Do you chew on your straws?
- Why not. Straws are a delicacy in this world. Not everyone in this world can eat straw, or chew straw. In fact, it is more an acquired taste, something like blood.
27) Do you have curly hair?
- Mother fucker, enough about hair ok?
28) Where is the next place you’re going?
- Toilet
29) Who is the rudest person in your life?
- Myself
30) What is the last thing you ate?
- Some bun. I can see that this information is going to make you a millionaire, whoever 'you' is.
31) Is marriage in your future?
- Problem is I love women too much to love a woman.
32) What is the best movie you’ve seen in the past two weeks?
- Let me think. Don't call me, I'll call you.
33) Is there anyone you like right now?
- Of course yes. Myself.
34) When was the last time you did the dishes?
- The last time I did MY dishes.
35) Are you currently depressed?
- Do I look like I am depressed? I ma gonna shoot somebody just for the heck of it and say 'Hell no I am not depressed.'
36) Did you cry today?
- Nope. Why the hell would I cry for no apparent reason. I am not those people who goes 'Love hurts the most. I am dying. God please help me. I need to love that girl, and ultimately fuck the hell out of her. God, your payment would be when she's screaming 'OH MY GOD OH MY GOD'. Deal?'
37) Why did you answer and post this?
- I have no idea. I was too jobless, and I thought if zhi wei did it, its probably stupid enough for me to do.
38) Tag 5 people who would do this survey
Same.
__________________________________________________________________
Anyway, here's an interesting friendster bulletin my friend Kumaran posted.
Hell - Explained by a Chemistry tuition.
Actual exam in Washington ok? Don't play play.
Question : Is Hell endothermic or exothermic?
Most of the students wrote proofs of other beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats whent is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets toHell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.As for how many souls are enteringHell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and taking into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."
Apparently he got an A+.
Fuck, that's what I call a genius.
Monday, May 28, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
And I am back?
Alright. I just have to mention this.
People. Control your greed.
Before you get agitated and go 'OMGWTF LESLIE IS IN TROUBLE!!' (wtf is wrong with my keyboard why suddenly cannot press spacey while holding shifty? )
Alright, listen on, or rather literally read on.
Some woman called me on Saturday as I was witnessing zhi wei debate in Times Square.
She said she was from some company ( damn blurred that time, I couldn't understand what she was talking about )
Apparently some company is holding some form of event and invites me to go.
I gave her my name. And hung up.
Two days later, she called again. She said she is at the event venue, and asking whether I am at the said venue or not ( whoever heard of a central park/central garden? )
I said no, then she said I won a lucky draw. I can claim it at a later date.
Beginning to sound fishy. (Fishier than a big fish left out in the sun for three days, which were on top of other fish, which were inside a WHALE - Chris Nosal )
Anyway, she left a contact number. Note : The calls from her were from a private number
Then, next day, she called me again. Said the prize I actually won was RM12,000. Sounds too good to be true? She began elaborating on all the shit about her company, which is based in Macau. Damn convincing. Asked for my IC number. Then asked me to bring my IC along for verification when I claim my prize.
Sounds even fishier. But still sounds more realistic and convincing.
Next day again, she called me. This time she asked for my bank account number. O_o Said the prize money is in a Shang Hai or Hong Kong bank, and need my account number to be transferred.
I hung up immediately. Then I realized I was looking at my account number on my ATM card. I came so close to giving her my account number.
Now that I think back on it, I realize its all false. I will tell you why.
1) She called my number, said my number was a random draw from a computer.
2) She did not know my name, only my chinese name which is written wrongly because I don't know which character it was xD
3) She did not know my IC number, but need my IC for verification purposes?
4) Can't speak english. What the fuck.
5) Doesn't know what a college is.
6) Its all too good to be true man.
7) I was told all these kind of things, based in Macau, are 99.9% fake.
I have not settled her yet. But currently am thinking of the most sadistic way to trouble her.
I was told not to entertain them at all haha. But who cares, I am going to try and trouble them. At the very least swear at her for 10 minutes the next time she calls.
I said don't be greedy because they are very good at convincing people. If you are observant enough, she knows my name because i told her, and she knows my IC number because i told her too. She just pretends to know it beforehand.
DON'T BE GREEDY
________________________________________________________________
I got the official letter from JPA. I am enrolled in INTEC college, University Teknologi Mara ( UiTM ). Going to study Australian Matriculation ( AUSMAT ). 18 months.
As I read through the letter, I got damn stressed xD Every single little thing and they threaten to cancel the contract and I have to pay them back.
And they have the power to cancel the contract without notifying me, and I have to pay them back then.
Sounds shitty? I have to be bonded for 6 years. 7 years if I for some reasons do not complete my course within alloted time ( 4 years overseas )
Must report immediately upon return.
Haha whatever, its all free, thats the important thing.
_________________________________________________________________
Hmm, fixing connection line in Subang Jaya. Should have internet connection within the next two weeks.
Leaving INTI Subang somewhere around 3rd week of June. Have lots of shit to do.
Anybody wanting to meet me, hurry!! ( haha sound like some typical celebrity )
CELEBRITY!??
Damn I want to flame something lar.
Celebrities are overrated. If they are hot, never mind then. If they are not hot, fuck them.
I always thought Mawi was overrated. His face appeared everywhere. Eat instant noodles see him. Go with cousin to Eon to service car see him. Drive around town see him. Take LRT see him.
Its a screwed up thing when people don't know the Agung's name but know Mawi.
No, don't think I am flaming Mawi ( alone ). I am going to flame a lot more, haha. I don't hate Mawi. Its just that seeing him everywhere without seeing the real him is a strange thing. How strange? Very strange. Why strange? Because its strange.
Then there's the matter with shampoo advertisements. Which lawfully stupid person thought of using a Malay girl wearing a tudung ( scarf ) for a shampoo advertisement? WE CAN SEE NO HAIR!!!!
Don't tell us your product makes the hair all smooth and silky and dandruff free and damn seductive because WE CAN SEE NO HAIR!!!
Brightening the scarve does not show the effect because WE CAN SEE NO HAIR!!!
Penguins should rule the world and beat the hell out of these idiots.
People. Control your greed.
Before you get agitated and go 'OMGWTF LESLIE IS IN TROUBLE!!' (wtf is wrong with my keyboard why suddenly cannot press spacey while holding shifty? )
Alright, listen on, or rather literally read on.
Some woman called me on Saturday as I was witnessing zhi wei debate in Times Square.
She said she was from some company ( damn blurred that time, I couldn't understand what she was talking about )
Apparently some company is holding some form of event and invites me to go.
I gave her my name. And hung up.
Two days later, she called again. She said she is at the event venue, and asking whether I am at the said venue or not ( whoever heard of a central park/central garden? )
I said no, then she said I won a lucky draw. I can claim it at a later date.
Beginning to sound fishy. (Fishier than a big fish left out in the sun for three days, which were on top of other fish, which were inside a WHALE - Chris Nosal )
Anyway, she left a contact number. Note : The calls from her were from a private number
Then, next day, she called me again. Said the prize I actually won was RM12,000. Sounds too good to be true? She began elaborating on all the shit about her company, which is based in Macau. Damn convincing. Asked for my IC number. Then asked me to bring my IC along for verification when I claim my prize.
Sounds even fishier. But still sounds more realistic and convincing.
Next day again, she called me. This time she asked for my bank account number. O_o Said the prize money is in a Shang Hai or Hong Kong bank, and need my account number to be transferred.
I hung up immediately. Then I realized I was looking at my account number on my ATM card. I came so close to giving her my account number.
Now that I think back on it, I realize its all false. I will tell you why.
1) She called my number, said my number was a random draw from a computer.
2) She did not know my name, only my chinese name which is written wrongly because I don't know which character it was xD
3) She did not know my IC number, but need my IC for verification purposes?
4) Can't speak english. What the fuck.
5) Doesn't know what a college is.
6) Its all too good to be true man.
7) I was told all these kind of things, based in Macau, are 99.9% fake.
I have not settled her yet. But currently am thinking of the most sadistic way to trouble her.
I was told not to entertain them at all haha. But who cares, I am going to try and trouble them. At the very least swear at her for 10 minutes the next time she calls.
I said don't be greedy because they are very good at convincing people. If you are observant enough, she knows my name because i told her, and she knows my IC number because i told her too. She just pretends to know it beforehand.
DON'T BE GREEDY
________________________________________________________________
I got the official letter from JPA. I am enrolled in INTEC college, University Teknologi Mara ( UiTM ). Going to study Australian Matriculation ( AUSMAT ). 18 months.
As I read through the letter, I got damn stressed xD Every single little thing and they threaten to cancel the contract and I have to pay them back.
And they have the power to cancel the contract without notifying me, and I have to pay them back then.
Sounds shitty? I have to be bonded for 6 years. 7 years if I for some reasons do not complete my course within alloted time ( 4 years overseas )
Must report immediately upon return.
Haha whatever, its all free, thats the important thing.
_________________________________________________________________
Hmm, fixing connection line in Subang Jaya. Should have internet connection within the next two weeks.
Leaving INTI Subang somewhere around 3rd week of June. Have lots of shit to do.
Anybody wanting to meet me, hurry!! ( haha sound like some typical celebrity )
CELEBRITY!??
Damn I want to flame something lar.
Celebrities are overrated. If they are hot, never mind then. If they are not hot, fuck them.
I always thought Mawi was overrated. His face appeared everywhere. Eat instant noodles see him. Go with cousin to Eon to service car see him. Drive around town see him. Take LRT see him.
Its a screwed up thing when people don't know the Agung's name but know Mawi.
No, don't think I am flaming Mawi ( alone ). I am going to flame a lot more, haha. I don't hate Mawi. Its just that seeing him everywhere without seeing the real him is a strange thing. How strange? Very strange. Why strange? Because its strange.
Then there's the matter with shampoo advertisements. Which lawfully stupid person thought of using a Malay girl wearing a tudung ( scarf ) for a shampoo advertisement? WE CAN SEE NO HAIR!!!!
Don't tell us your product makes the hair all smooth and silky and dandruff free and damn seductive because WE CAN SEE NO HAIR!!!
Brightening the scarve does not show the effect because WE CAN SEE NO HAIR!!!
Penguins should rule the world and beat the hell out of these idiots.
Friday, May 11, 2007
Update
Alrightee, Professor Leslie is back for the weekend in BP!
Back to topic.
A simple case of elaborating what happened in Subang Jaya.
Enrolled in Inti Subang. Paid RM900. Found a nice room right behind Inti. Paid RM990 for 3 months deposit.
Studied in Inti for a week. Get JPA. Cannot study elsewhere other than what they offer. Fucked.
JPA recognizes the genius at crap behind Professor Leslie. I am offered Engineering in New Zealand.
They have a wicked sense of humour. I am a lactose intolerant asshole. I get diarrhea if i drink milk. They send me to milkland. Fuck.
That concluded what happened.
Now I shall go into detail.
Took Economics, Physics, Chemistry, Mechanics, Mathematics. With a stupid compulsory subject of Moral.
Interestingly, all the lecturers have their very own personalities.
My Physics/Mechanics teacher was a past engineer. So I daresay he is excellent at the subject. But I leave his class each time with many bullet wounds.
First day in class ( Physics/Mechanics )
Teacher : Alright, let us begin the first class for the first semester by introducing yourself, what you plan to study and where.
Me : My name is Leslie sir. I intend to study Chemical Engineering or Mechanical Engineering.
Teacher : Where?
Me : Erm, I am hoping to go to the UK.
Teacher : So, have you thought of which University?
Me : *quickly think, simply think* Ah yes, I checked out and I think U of Birmingham is a good place to consider.
Teacher : Birmingham!! Hmm, not bad. Nice place.
*a pause in between while he asks others*
*Teacher turns back*
Teacher : Birmingham is a really good place to go. It ranks first or second in England for engineering among the universities. *further elaboration*
Teacher : I graduated from there many years ago.
Me : *ZHA DAO*
Then he began teaching. I was feeling naughty. I wanted to test the extend of his capabilities as a teacher. I asked a classic question High School teachers were never able to answer.
'How do we measure the acceleration for an object moving in a fixed circle?'
His answer : Physics is like a game. Where you have a game, you have to have a rule. I give you an example, you play a game where you pass a ball to the right. But you don't stand up suddenly and say 'I want to pass the ball to the left!'. Your friends will look at you and say 'Go play by yourself then!'
Me : *feels a bullet biting into my flesh, severing several arteries and spilling blood*
Friday morning : I found out I am receiving a scholarship offer by JPA.
Me : Sir, I got a JPA offer, might be leaving soon :(
Teacher : Oh you got JPA! Where? New Zealand!! Nice place nice place...
Me : *anticipating talks about Birmingham*
Teacher : Alright, congrats!
...
Teacher : Okay class, I have prepared an exercise for you to do today. As your assignments will contribute a 10% marks in your semester exam, I think I shall include this exercise in the marks.
*looks at me*
Teacher : Of course you won't need it lar haha..
Me : *feels another M16 bullet hit me dead in the heart, severing more arteries and spilling blood*
Last class for Friday. Physics.
Teacher came into class.
Teacher : Eh! Why are you still here? I thought you went off to JPA already.
Me : *feels an entire magazine of 30 bullets from an M16 piercing my entire body.*
Damn, I like that teacher. He is so cool. Serious.
_____________________________________________________________
Dickson, in his blog mentioned separating boys and girls in NS. He speculated homosexual marriages will be on the rise.
Professor Leslie shall be here to further elaborate.
Dickson, I have to disagree with you. Guys and girls sleep separated. But so far guys have not been gaying around in the bedroom ( although coach told me before there had been cases where three boys actually shared a single bed. )
But I agree that it is stupid to separate them. Its time to be more open minded. Sexual separation, in the long run is going to be a major problem.
Once, in the newspapers, it has been published that the number of couples getting married is on the decline, and the number of divorces is rising.
*of course, some wise guys whom i forgot their identity say men should be encouraged to marry spinsters/widows to reduce single women. Damn that's fucking stupid.
Alright, the issue of separation is not a good one.
The Great Guin and the Polarized Panda can testify for that.
Why?
Camp is going to be fucking dull! What better past time than to Go-ogle at opposite sexes when there is no classes or activities? And I can't imagine the mamak with only guys.
Everywhere we jostle with muscular bodies. Fuck.
But when its a mixed camp, it adds to the fun, but might not necessarily add to the chicks produced. We don't want baby trainees... yet. Furthermore, there are night patrols. If they want to do something funny, boy + girl in secluded spot, they might get spotted by patrols and spot themselves silly.
But anyway, in camp we have very good restrictions. So hankypanky thoughts are out of the scope. I personally do know guys who masturbate during the training stint though -____-""
You see, there is still order maintained even though we do activities together. Guys vs guys, girls vs girls.
Guys root for girls when girls compete, girls root for guys when guys compete.
I can't imagine guys rooting for guys when guys compete.
Imagine :
Lets say... rafting competition.
Ten muscular guys mount the raft. At the lake sides, groups of guys cheered, ecstatic.
"OMG YOU ARE IN MY TEAM GO GO GO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!"
The horror.
In the event of a victory.
"DAMN YOU ARE SO SEXY I JUST GOT TO HUG YOU AND KISS YOU!"
Of course, if that is said by a girl to a guy who just won, it is extremely rewarding. BUT if it is said by a guy to a guy...
just imagine a guy wearing mini skirts, taking pom poms and jumping and frisking around screaming away for his team.
It is often portrayed that cheerleaders are always beautiful girls, and guy athletes are always damn handsome, and always wins. The guy somehow always end up with the prettiest cheerleader.
But if the cheerleader is a guy..
HAHA IMAGINE THE KISS!!!! Where the overexcited supposedly-damn-hot-girl-but-is-a-guy cheerleader grabs the athlete, hugs him and gives him a deep deep kiss.
Of course we don't want to see that scene right?
And true to say, it is much interesting when there are girls around and there are guys around. I don't mean round girls round guys. I mean there's the presence of both guys and girls.
NS should be fun. NS should not be gay.
I still say let the Great Guin and the Polarized Panda rule the world together.
Back to topic.
A simple case of elaborating what happened in Subang Jaya.
Enrolled in Inti Subang. Paid RM900. Found a nice room right behind Inti. Paid RM990 for 3 months deposit.
Studied in Inti for a week. Get JPA. Cannot study elsewhere other than what they offer. Fucked.
JPA recognizes the genius at crap behind Professor Leslie. I am offered Engineering in New Zealand.
They have a wicked sense of humour. I am a lactose intolerant asshole. I get diarrhea if i drink milk. They send me to milkland. Fuck.
That concluded what happened.
Now I shall go into detail.
Took Economics, Physics, Chemistry, Mechanics, Mathematics. With a stupid compulsory subject of Moral.
Interestingly, all the lecturers have their very own personalities.
My Physics/Mechanics teacher was a past engineer. So I daresay he is excellent at the subject. But I leave his class each time with many bullet wounds.
First day in class ( Physics/Mechanics )
Teacher : Alright, let us begin the first class for the first semester by introducing yourself, what you plan to study and where.
Me : My name is Leslie sir. I intend to study Chemical Engineering or Mechanical Engineering.
Teacher : Where?
Me : Erm, I am hoping to go to the UK.
Teacher : So, have you thought of which University?
Me : *quickly think, simply think* Ah yes, I checked out and I think U of Birmingham is a good place to consider.
Teacher : Birmingham!! Hmm, not bad. Nice place.
*a pause in between while he asks others*
*Teacher turns back*
Teacher : Birmingham is a really good place to go. It ranks first or second in England for engineering among the universities. *further elaboration*
Teacher : I graduated from there many years ago.
Me : *ZHA DAO*
Then he began teaching. I was feeling naughty. I wanted to test the extend of his capabilities as a teacher. I asked a classic question High School teachers were never able to answer.
'How do we measure the acceleration for an object moving in a fixed circle?'
His answer : Physics is like a game. Where you have a game, you have to have a rule. I give you an example, you play a game where you pass a ball to the right. But you don't stand up suddenly and say 'I want to pass the ball to the left!'. Your friends will look at you and say 'Go play by yourself then!'
Me : *feels a bullet biting into my flesh, severing several arteries and spilling blood*
Friday morning : I found out I am receiving a scholarship offer by JPA.
Me : Sir, I got a JPA offer, might be leaving soon :(
Teacher : Oh you got JPA! Where? New Zealand!! Nice place nice place...
Me : *anticipating talks about Birmingham*
Teacher : Alright, congrats!
...
Teacher : Okay class, I have prepared an exercise for you to do today. As your assignments will contribute a 10% marks in your semester exam, I think I shall include this exercise in the marks.
*looks at me*
Teacher : Of course you won't need it lar haha..
Me : *feels another M16 bullet hit me dead in the heart, severing more arteries and spilling blood*
Last class for Friday. Physics.
Teacher came into class.
Teacher : Eh! Why are you still here? I thought you went off to JPA already.
Me : *feels an entire magazine of 30 bullets from an M16 piercing my entire body.*
Damn, I like that teacher. He is so cool. Serious.
_____________________________________________________________
Dickson, in his blog mentioned separating boys and girls in NS. He speculated homosexual marriages will be on the rise.
Professor Leslie shall be here to further elaborate.
Dickson, I have to disagree with you. Guys and girls sleep separated. But so far guys have not been gaying around in the bedroom ( although coach told me before there had been cases where three boys actually shared a single bed. )
But I agree that it is stupid to separate them. Its time to be more open minded. Sexual separation, in the long run is going to be a major problem.
Once, in the newspapers, it has been published that the number of couples getting married is on the decline, and the number of divorces is rising.
*of course, some wise guys whom i forgot their identity say men should be encouraged to marry spinsters/widows to reduce single women. Damn that's fucking stupid.
Alright, the issue of separation is not a good one.
The Great Guin and the Polarized Panda can testify for that.
Why?
Camp is going to be fucking dull! What better past time than to Go-ogle at opposite sexes when there is no classes or activities? And I can't imagine the mamak with only guys.
Everywhere we jostle with muscular bodies. Fuck.
But when its a mixed camp, it adds to the fun, but might not necessarily add to the chicks produced. We don't want baby trainees... yet. Furthermore, there are night patrols. If they want to do something funny, boy + girl in secluded spot, they might get spotted by patrols and spot themselves silly.
But anyway, in camp we have very good restrictions. So hankypanky thoughts are out of the scope. I personally do know guys who masturbate during the training stint though -____-""
You see, there is still order maintained even though we do activities together. Guys vs guys, girls vs girls.
Guys root for girls when girls compete, girls root for guys when guys compete.
I can't imagine guys rooting for guys when guys compete.
Imagine :
Lets say... rafting competition.
Ten muscular guys mount the raft. At the lake sides, groups of guys cheered, ecstatic.
"OMG YOU ARE IN MY TEAM GO GO GO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!"
The horror.
In the event of a victory.
"DAMN YOU ARE SO SEXY I JUST GOT TO HUG YOU AND KISS YOU!"
Of course, if that is said by a girl to a guy who just won, it is extremely rewarding. BUT if it is said by a guy to a guy...
just imagine a guy wearing mini skirts, taking pom poms and jumping and frisking around screaming away for his team.
It is often portrayed that cheerleaders are always beautiful girls, and guy athletes are always damn handsome, and always wins. The guy somehow always end up with the prettiest cheerleader.
But if the cheerleader is a guy..
HAHA IMAGINE THE KISS!!!! Where the overexcited supposedly-damn-hot-girl-but-is-a-guy cheerleader grabs the athlete, hugs him and gives him a deep deep kiss.
Of course we don't want to see that scene right?
And true to say, it is much interesting when there are girls around and there are guys around. I don't mean round girls round guys. I mean there's the presence of both guys and girls.
NS should be fun. NS should not be gay.
I still say let the Great Guin and the Polarized Panda rule the world together.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Prof Leslie
Alright, I am heading up to Subang Jaya in a few hours time, so I am going to get myself some sleep.
And fuck, I have a fever, right before my stepping into college life.
Anyhow, Professor Leslie is here to say, expect not much updates from now on as I probably will not have access to the Internet for sometime ( I know, tough, but shit happens )
Anyway, to people who actually bother to keep in touch with me, I'll probably be using my new hotmail account in MSN more often now.
Since those who reads my blog are those who DO keep in touch with me, here's the address :
Prof_Leslie at Hotmail dot com.
And for those who are the hoppers and just would like to add me up for fun, please do not try as I will reject.
Alright, hope the best for me! Do come back and check my blog often!
I am not actually declaring hiatus. Its uncertain what the future holds for my Internet connection haha
And fuck, I have a fever, right before my stepping into college life.
Anyhow, Professor Leslie is here to say, expect not much updates from now on as I probably will not have access to the Internet for sometime ( I know, tough, but shit happens )
Anyway, to people who actually bother to keep in touch with me, I'll probably be using my new hotmail account in MSN more often now.
Since those who reads my blog are those who DO keep in touch with me, here's the address :
Prof_Leslie at Hotmail dot com.
And for those who are the hoppers and just would like to add me up for fun, please do not try as I will reject.
Alright, hope the best for me! Do come back and check my blog often!
I am not actually declaring hiatus. Its uncertain what the future holds for my Internet connection haha
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