Update yay!

Sorry been a bit lazy lately.

First off, two weeks after my grandma passing away, my father's been diagnosed with colon cancer. It is somewhere around stage 2 to stage 3.

Look, despite my age, I still am not ready to be an orphan ok? Dad's situation looks bad, the tumour seems to be almost blocking his large intestines.

Can only hope he gets fine soon.

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Anyway, today Professor Leslie's topic will be 'People on the net'. Yeah we all know, everyone's a bully in the Internet. Everyone dares to say stuff they never dare to say in reality. After all, virtual world is virtual world.

I shall elaborate each breed that I can think of, and give a rating of how much they deserve to get called an idiot and should be slapped twice or maybe castrated ( guys lar, what to do with girls? ). All Ratings are with a base of 5.

First off, we have the lecherous kind. These are typical males on the net searching for sex, or just some pictures of pretty girls to satisfy themselves. Young and old alike. Though those underage will mention they are '21, tall dark handsome and freaking rich. I am nice and loved by all'. The old China Ah Peks ( assuming age 65, with only 3 strands of hair ) will mention 'I am 18, lots of hair-one ah!. Very the sexy-arh!!. Rich until like siao. Very good stamina oso!'

Rating : 4. These are the kind to get castrated.


Introducing the whineys! They are your typical online emos. They will splatter your MSN with their nick (e.g.) 'I deserve to die', 'Love is eternal, but why must you break my heart?', 'I will love you forever even though you don't love me'. You get the idea. Even when you try to cheer them up, they go 'this world is hell! I should die faster!!'

Rating : 0. You don't have to kill them or even abuse them. They kill themselves eventually.


These guys are the trendy kind. They are the trend setters. Leaves a trail of self-created language. In public chatrooms, MSN, these kind are everywhere! Example of self-created language : 'Eh sup bradder we are very the cool and eating turtle balls now! What? Want go keng to mamak for teh? On like microwave oven lar! Ducks will fly also no put aeroplane lah! I swear with my balls lar! Aiya I varoom over your place if you no blif me lar! Dunnid scared long chia wan, I very skill lar! Car see me oso scared one. Police bribe me sammore! I think I very cool leh! Come lar let leng lui see us outside bla bla bla' They can think up of all sorts of words that make sense to them. 'I diao him!!!' 'I want to sut her!!'

Rating : 2 ( they are quite funny actually )

A new breed that occurs inevitably. These guys are the un-net-savvy net users. These guys don't understand computers, and think blogs are used in construction. They think friendster is a pet, and MSN is a kind of chocolate you buy online. Sometimes quite frustrating, but most of the time, you bet your smelly underwear they need help.
'You scroll your cursor over using your mouse..'
'Mouse? Wait I go catch one!'

Rating : 2.5 ( Ignorance is not a sin!! )

These are the flying hoppers. They hop around without landing for a solid minute. These guys are annoying, the ones that make noise anyway. Particularly in blogs, their presence can be felt. They just suddenly pop up in your cbox 'Hi there, nice blog ^^' and then they disappear.. forever. Sometimes you wonder is it even worth it to reply them, but you do anyway, in false hope that they will be back to read you say 'Whatever name : Hi. Thanks'

Rating : 3

These are the CAPS people. No offense to CAPS WOMAN, I don't mean you haha. These are the breed where every single word typed must be in caps. I mean it. Every. Single. Word. And. Alphabet.
'EH YOU DO HOMEWORK OR NOT YET? I WANT COPY!!'
'I THINK YOU ARE AN IDIOT!'
'OH YEAH? COME FIGHT WHO LOUDER LAR!!!!!!'

Rating : 3.25

Observers. You know they are there. They know they are there. Their presence is felt. But what the hell, some of them are shy, some of them don't like to be online and various other reasons. Whatever the reason, they are there, but they are not there. Imagine a chatroom with 3 people. 2 people's fingers are working furiously, and this observer only works his right forefinger. Guess what he/she types?
'...'
'???'
And 'Bye'

Rating : 3.4

These are the angry dudes. They want to offend everyone in the world. They are angry, and they think it is right to spread anger. They are jealous. Feel their hatred. Feel their wrath. Every single thing offends them.
"Hey dude, what brand of keyboard you using? Logitech?"
"What? Want say I cheap buy useless keyboards is it? You go to hell lar!"

Another example would be too vulgar. It is against my principals to not post it up. But for once, pity the kids who visit my blog regularly.

Rating : 4.75 ( Kill them all. Burn them! Slaughter them for the penguins! )

And finally. I don't have a name for this breed. To Keith if you happen to see this : I think I shall call this kind the Handsome Nutcases. There's one in every neighbourhood. Haha.

These kind are the strangest. They possess all the intellect, the wealth, the looks, the attitude and everything. They online. They get popular. Then they are ever rarely online. Their fans yell in excitement when they are online. Their entire page is flooded with add requests. Their friendster lags like shit because too many pretty girls and gays adding them. Each time you try to strike up a chat with them, they say 'Eh I gtg in a while, bye', then they appear offline in MSN.

Rating : 1

And the ultimate Internet users! Well for your information, if you do not realize it yet,





PENGUINS DO NOT USE THE INTERNET YOU IDIOT!

Rating : -5

Conclusion : Everyone deserves to die in the Internet. Haha. Then there's the Professor Leslie kind. The kind who doesn't make any sense.

Note : Please note that the above post is not meant to offend, but in fact is meant to entertain. Contains facts and fictions, up to reader's own penguin brain to figure out which is which. Should you feel offended, you should check out the 'Angry' breed, and think about how much you deserve to get spanked. Then email me your name and address and your rating, and I'll reply you right here right now "I received your mail, thanks but I am choosing to ignore it". There.

All rights reserve. Anyone seeking to copy or use any contents in this page without my approval will suffer the wrath of penguins. Beware the next time you go to the toilet. Penguins are known to have sharp beaks. Check before you sit down.

Modern Gadgets

Okay, for the second time I will be typing this post. My aunt denied closing my Firefox window, but obviously I won't be closing my blog post which I typed without saving it.

Alright. *Takes deep breath*

Today Professor Leslie shall talk about Modern Gadgets. Nowadays with the technology advancements growing at such a rapid rate, you can bet your sorry underwear that these gadgets are sprouting up like mushrooms. You can wear a belt around your waist and strap it full with gadgets like camera, phone, iPod.. etc etc.

Professor shall further elaborate on these amazing Gadgets, and give a rating for them.

Note : All ratings are with a base of 5.

Modern Handphone : - Modern Handphones are the average Joes in all the Gadgets rank. Why? Because they have every feature. Phone, SMS, MMS, camera, video, music, bluetooth, WiFi.. and the list goes on. Why Average? Because every single feature sucks. Phone feature not as useful nor cheap as house phone, camera and video quality sucks when compared with REAL cameras. Music? Not as good as iPod. The phone lags like shit fuck if you load it over half its memory, and hangs all the time. Bluetooth is like a free fortunately, but it still sucks because anybody can stalk you. WiFi is seriously not safe because anybody can hack you.
Rating : 3.5

iPod : - This invention is seriously a wonder. It is a handphone that cannot call, a camera that cannot take pictures, a club that cannot hit anything, a TV that is too small to watch anything, and it plays music. Oh and its real expensive.
Rating : 2.0

Cameras : - These babies are an essential part of life. Ever wondered why Dinosaurs died out? Because they don't have cameras. Cameras record every sweet moment of your life ( no pornos please ). Imagine a person falling down and you are acting like CAPS WOMAN and going 'HAHAHAHAHAHHAAH!' God I sure would like to take a photo or record it down. Imagine WTF WEI apprehending robbers? That would be great for camera shots. Or imagine some hot girl is walking down the street.
Rating : 4.0

Laptops/Notebooks : - Seriously, these are the worry gadgets. They cost a lot. And they are heavy even though they can be lugged around. You worry about theft, you worry you might drop it, you worry you might spill coffee over it, you worry your son surfs porno over it, you worry kena hack, you worry got virus, you worry shit. Conclusion is, you get a computer everywhere you might possibly go.
Rating : 2.5

Thumb Drives : - These seriously are useful toys. I mean, a portable 2 GB in your hands literally. You can load all sorts of stuff in it, and never worry as long as you still have it. But beware when going to toilets. You might wonder why you shit suddenly so erect. And then you realize it. The horror.
Rating : 3.0

Walkie-Talkies : - These babes are seriously a wonder. What other gadgets allow you to send spoken text messages? The only downside is that they are HUGE, and expensive. But otherwise this device comes in especially useful. Imagine a superhero fighting crime with a W-T. A damsel is being threatened by a lecher and his dog. The superhero ( imagine WTF Wei coming to the rescue ) jumps in after receiving the call via his W-T. He pokes the man in the eye with the antennae of the W-T and whacks the dog with the hard body of the W-T. After the villians are defeated he cracks open a crab's pincers and extract the flesh for the maiden. He would then continue to fight crime, but he is out of range and therefore cannot receive call for help. So he lives happily ever after with the maiden.
Rating : 3.75

Playstation Portable ( PSP ) : - These guys are way cool. What better thing than to have a PS at your disposal every single moment? It is basically a handphone. A better version of Nokia Ngage that cannot call and cannot send messages. Other than that everything is still the same.
Rating : 2.5

Playstation ( And anything similiar ) : These kids are way better than computers in playing games man.. And way much cheaper too!
Rating : 4.25

I guess that's all the gadgets I can think of for now. Tell me more gadgets, once enough I shall make another post like this?

How to Save a Life??

First things first.. I apologize for the week overdue update.

Firstly, it was because the photos were not ready as promised.

Secondly, my grandmother finally passed away peacefully.

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Anyway, the photos first. I think I will upload everything onto my multiply. You know, fuck it I might as well load all my photos up instead of saving it in the computer and risk being reformatted.

I sent four rolls of films to Charlie photo in Summit Batu Pahat. The counter assistant served me, and I told her 'Burn CD only'.

She stared at me, then asked me to wait. As if such requests were unusual. ( Oh wait, it IS unusual xD Who the hell would use a film to burn into a CD after the invention of digital cams? )

She returned and told me the price.

RM 5 each roll for film process fee. RM 9 for each roll to burn.

4 rolls add up to around RM 56.

Anyway, she told me to give RM 20 deposit, which I did. Which also meant I still have to pay RM 36 when I retrieve them. That was Sunday the 11th if i wasn't mistaken. She told me they would be ready by Wednesday, the 14th.

On the 14th, I was told it wasn't ready. What the fuck.

So I went back on the 16th. Friday. And yes, it was ready. When I asked her how much.. she took out a calculator and began typing. Then she showed me the calculator.

RM 16.

What the fuck?????????????????????

She showed me how she got that. Simple. 4 rolls of film at RM 9 each is RM 36. I paid RM 20 deposit, so now I pay RM 16.

I got so confused that I paid without asking anymore questions.

I gave her a RM 50. She returned me RM 10. '_'???????????????????????

Apparently I wasn't the only one confused hahahahahahah!

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And on Friday, after I got the CDs with photos, I returned home for lunch. As I was having lunch, my grandmother finally passed away after so long. Yeah, her health was seriously deteriorating, and she seemed to be in agony.

The funeral was held immediately. 3 days in the whatever-place-you-call it. I stayed up two nights in a row to watch over grandma. Together with my cousins of course.

Apparently Chinese believes that if a black cat jumps over the corpse of a just-passed-away person, that person would come back alive in a zombie state. Meaning unrest among the dead.

My cousin saw grandma. She said her goosebumps just rised suddenly but us others felt nothing. Then she was just staring at grandmother while we were chatting away, then she suddenly waved at somebody.

Me and my cousin saw that and turned but saw nobody. Then we asked her she said she didn't do any waving, so we assumed she was mad.

She finally admitted seeing a shadow beside grandma when they were home.

To cut the story short, grandmother is now safely buried beside grandfather.

I miss you Ah Ma.

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Alright, continue with NS.

This is Hazlee. He is one hell of a handsome dude back in camp. And you bet your smelly underwears he is admired by many a Malay girl. Oh yeah, he is also the champion for Cross Country ( 5km distance, which he completed in 18 minutes ).

NS was fun! The rafting team won by 0.00000000000000001 seconds to qualify into the finals hahaha. A Paddle's difference was what my teacher said. Yes, it was that close. And we lost terribly in the finals because we changed one person. That shifted the entire strength balance.

My bahas team won champion for the bahas competition! I was the fourth reserve, and my main role is to contribute POIs, points, and rebuttals. Which I did. And my friends used it well. And we managed to bash our way through to become champ!

And of course, the Chinese guys were pissed off with me. They thought I was showing off when I just walk into their dorm. Then they started their insults saying I had an easy job just sitting there without need to speak. I haven't even uttered a single word. What the fuck is wrong with these guys?

Debate notes.

In Johor, Indians are called 'India'. In Malacca, they are called 'Macha'. I don't know what it means though.
Vetiyananthan ( aka Macha ) and me. We're being assholes, haha. Our second speaker was talking and we were posing for photos. Hahaha xD This was the finals.

What else?? Hmm.. Charlie was Champion for the entire camp's competitions. We got a final score of 29/40, with Bravo 2nd with score 22/40, followed by Alpha 19/40 and Delta got last.

Our teachers were beaming!

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Not much to say about the activities other than its fun. Though I personally feel that the only real thing given real emphasis is the Physical competitions. The Character Building class and Patriotism class wasn't given much importance ( though I liked the teachers ), and the Sastera class seriously sucked ( I seriously hated the instructors ).

The instructors just came suddenly, say 'we are not here for any direct teaching. You do the job and we guide you'.

And what he really means is, he sits down there and shakes his leg while we do our job.

And he has the cheek to show us a pissed off face, as though we were the ones not contributing.

Community Service is a screwed up programme. It said community service. I think they got 'Learning while visiting' and 'Community service' mixed up. Our community service involves going to Museums to look-see-look-see, going to the firefighter's place to learn the way things operate and such. My idea of community service was going to the old folks home, orphanage, clean up places and help flood victims. What the fuck???

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I have a problem with some of the Chinese guys there. In my own company.

I mix well with everyone there. Be they Malay, Chinese or especially Indians. I like the Indian dudes there.

Malay guys are cool and sporting, and they don't nurture any feelings of hate and such.

Chinese guys majority are a great bunch. They are great achievers in sports or academics.

But there is this group, who are neither that excellent in sports, and seriously they don't do well in studies. And their ego, well, the biggest is what I can say. A small slight thing, and they try to pick a fight. They don't like your face, every single sentence you say is rudely rebuked.

I don't like them. In fact, I hate them.

There was once A and B quarreled. During our celebration night B didn't want to join, instead choosing to remain seated quietly at a side. I was concerned so I asked C 'Did A and B quarrel?'

C goes 'MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS LAR STUPID! What for so kepoh???????????'

Okay lor, kasi lu menang.

Then A comes along and says 'oi Leslie, you talk bad about me ar?' gave me a glare and wanted to beat me up.

I mean, why must you practise such ways? Uncivilized scums. Yes I am a bitter person =/

Going by race, the ones I respect most would be the Indians there ( very minority ) followed by Malays. I don't respect some of the Chinese there.

But then, don't want to be labeled as rascist, would I?


Lazy to update photos. Go see my multiply.

Education in Malaysia

Just a short post since its that 'festive' period of the year again.

And to satiate the cravings of my friends and silence their incessant cries for updates.

For the moment anyway.

For all of you wondering..

I GOT 10 1As for SPM!!!

And I got a 1A for GCE 1119 English!

Ego booster man xD

Yeah, Batu Pahat only 9 people got straight 1s. 8 in High School.

Now busy applying for scholarships.

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Which brings me to the topic of Yayasan Tenaga Nasional's scholarship.

I filled in the forms with every meticulous effort and in every single detail, but my form was rejected in 0.00000000000000001 second. After I rechecked the criterias required, I realized I forgot to include my results for Biology and Moral Ed. Which is because I couldn't find them in the first place.

So I tried to fill in second time. I couldn't log in to the system at all.

So I was fucked. Have I just lost a scholarship chance?

In the end, I couldn't log in because they changed my ID and password =/ After spending 1283617451274213 years worrying and 12735127412745 years trying to figure out why, the reason was that simple.

It can be concluded. What the fuck.

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And today, I realized our JPNJ ( Jabatan Pelajaran Negeri Johor ) has a scary motto.

Here's a conversation between me and my aunt.

Me : I never realized JPNJ has such a scary motto.
Au : Why's that?
Me : It says here 'One step ahead'
Au : It has always been that motto what?
Me : Look here ( points at a rubber band JPNJ gave us )

It read : One Step A Head.

For those of you wondering, read carefully. If you still don't understand, lemme type out the BM direct translation for you.

'Satu Langkah Satu Kepala'.

What a difference a spacebar makes. Conspiracies!!!!!! They want our heads!!!!!!!!!