Mental cases

This is the view from my room window in Auckland during Spring. Its really nice.

I keep telling my stalking victim Aimee that I want to develop some mental problem so that I can be

1) infinitely much more annoying
2) And have a valid reason to be annoying, which is annoying + frustrating to others

Alas, I have failed for I underestimated the power of mankind.

Sometimes I get defeated by sheer naivety. My desperate attempts to be really annoying by saying totally unrealistic stuff failed because the victim believed me.

At times I get defeated by sheer lack of humour. The victim gave me a totally pissed look and the look-I-will-beat-you-up-if-you-go-any-further.

And most of the time, the victims just laugh when I say something stupid purposely.

Epic fail.

Now the professor shall list a couple of mental cases that are either attempted to develop or will attempt to develop.

Top on the list :

1 ) Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

For more information, check it up on wikipedia. Basically it sort of mean having the compulsion to MUST DO IT THAT WAY sort of thing. I like to collect stuff (and I probably have this problem though its not really a disorder), and most of the time I like to identify a pattern which will make them all nice and ordered. Take books for example, they.must.be.from.the.same.publisher. Why? Because the cover will be similiar of sorts, and the spine decorations will be of a nice pattern. Details omitted, but I got really pissed off one time when my aunt bought me a book from another publisher and I was mentally fantasizing burning that book.

2 ) 3-D complex

I don't know the exact term for this, so I made up that complex. It means an unhealthy obsession with a 3-D object, humans included. Aimee has this complex. This complex can be further divided depending on its object of interest. Siblings-obsession, celebrity obsession and the likes all fall under this category.

3 ) 2-D complex

This is an interesting one. Its an unhealthy obsession with 2D stuff, almost exclusively fictional characters (why 2D? Take mario for example. He's a sprite. Period.) This complex is slowly evolving into 3D, simply because now technology has the ability to generate 3D fictional characters.

One most interesting characteristics about this complex is it occurs mostly in guys (I think). There are many lifeless people out there who obsess with characters from animations or games. Trust me on this, everytime I go wallpaper hunting I will drop by the forums. And I see titles like 'which anime girl will you marry'. There was one guy who collected dakimakura covers (dakimakura is japanese term, not sure what it exactly is, but I think they are bedsheets or something.) The cover does not come with pretty butterflies or fish or even Garfield, there's a picture of an anime girl character in EXTREMELY suggestive position (self-help anyone?). By the way, I looked it up. They are not cheap. (100USD each is not cheap to me, not for these kind of stuff. And I am so not interested in it).

4) Plushie fetish

I invented this term. Seems to me that I am buying a lot of stuffed toys for the kids at home. And just before giving them away, I like to play around with it and try and find whats so interesting about it. In time, I realized I could probably annoy people really good if I made the point to the victim that I think more of the plushy compared to the victim.

Alas, epic fail. I became the victim. So much for being original.



These are the latest ones I bought for my cute little nieces. That's my Gundam model behind and the fearsome Monster Penguin on my coin can. The main object is the Kiwi bird, the penguin and the Pukeko (its an endemic swamp chicken in NZ. For those of you who can't understand 'endemic', it means its only found in a certain geographic location. In this case, its NZ)

I would call them finger puppets, but that would so nice and innocent. And so not me. Thus, I name them 'I like it up my ass plushies'. Crude. Yeah they're for kids.

Another purchase I bought is an interesting plushy. There's no name for it, but its the type where 'pull my tail and I shake!'. I was thinking it would jump around like Monster Penguin, but alas I got the shock of my life. ITS A FREAKING VIBRATOR. Nevertheless I bought it. Its fun and disturbing.

The last one is somewhat normal. It squeaks when you press it. Good for mental squishing the cute animal, because it makes a sqeak sound when you squish it. High pitch or low pitch? Just control the speed and strength you use to squish it.

5 ) Wiki-ism

Obsession with Wikipedia. Nobody is free from it.

6 ) Lezard-ism

This is a reference to the game Valkyrie Profile 2 in PS2. Symptoms include :

• Super unhealthy obsession with a Goddess
• Acute power hungry-ness which leads to

• Self proclaiming one as God, and using force to do whatever is desired.

7 ) Youtube fever

I am sure you know more about this than me, so I will cease any explanations before I even start.

I will defy George Carlin's law of 10 in a list and settle for 7 for now. I am sure many of you can relate to at least 2 of the above MWAHAHHA (the lezard mental case sounds interesting. I might do it someday)

Edit :

Number 8)

Facebook obsession. You people spend so much time on facebook and its apps, it annoyed the hell out of me. Unfortunately I am the victim here.

Number 9)

Room Obsession. I notice many scholars have this. The tendency to lock one self up in the room and study (or maybe jerk off or something.) I do not understand this case, and it annoys the hell out of me. The sun is losing popularity it seems. Unfortunately, I am the victim again.

Now, I just made myself sound normal didn't I? I am victim to so many of the cases above, it defeated my original purpose of listing these