Adopt a Mat Rempit

Saw this on kennysia.com.

Picture from the same source. Sorry for taking pictures from another blog xD Just feeling lazy. But a bit odd though, I didn't seem to see this report in NST. Dang should have been a bit more hardworking and go out to buy Star.

Anyway.. asking ministers to adopt a Mat Rempit so that they will be guided towards a better life.

If you consider his proposition, it makes quite a bit of sense. Considering the fact that these Mat Rempits usually (not all, note that) learn these stuff through their friends and lack of parental guidance. Ministers could coach them! Coached by a minister!!

Sorry John Kam xD Your picture does look like you are being enlightened by a holy light of sorts. If you think he is handsome.. check out their group! Djunglepeople

Ah back to the subject. It is no easy task, shows that the minister is ready to sacrifice lots of time and effort for the nation. He should be praised!!

Why is everybody at Kennysia.com laughing at them??

Yeah yeah, ministers nowaday seems to have a bad reputation.

1 ) Building fairytale castles without permission ( 'Others can do it why not me?' )

2 ) Over-adrenaline-drive in meetings ( hey they meant well, don't take it personally )

3 ) Blaming women for being victims of sexual-related crimes ( i did mention it before )

4 ) Laughable remarks all the time though they really meant it..

Yeah that's just a couple of examples. Now this minister has taken a better approach. He believes that will work for Mat Rempits.

Come on lar... as if these Mat Rempits will come with open arms and smile at you and say 'ADOPT ME!!!'

This picture is meant as a joke. Three retards. Don't mind it too much. Consider it as a visual-stimulant ( not sexual stimulant!!!! I know we're handsome )

Adoption basically goes two ways since it involves two parties. It has to be accepted by both parties. Mat Rempits are not kids. They are full grown adolescents. Though their mental mind begs to differ, but yes they are old enough to take care of themselves.

So, this is a suggestion. Why not we follow the minister's advice?

Yeah, what I mean is, we can also use this on our ministers!!! Adopt-a-minister. So that they will not be so stressed all the time and start suggestion exagerrated stuff. They can be guided so that they will not stray from being realistic.

Or maybe its just me ( and many more people ) unable to accept such stuff from leaders.

But then.. :) After all.. Malaysia Boleh!

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NS alert! NS alert! I am being sent to Masjid Tanah, Malacca for NS. Starting from 1st january 2007 to 11th March 2007. Now who was it that said it was to be 3 months?? Its 2 months and a week! And oh yeah, minus a week from that for CNY holidays. 2 months.

4 weeks spent on physical training. Wtf..

Bee is being sent to Miri! SERIOUS OR NOT??? Wahlau I missed Miri. I like Sarawak a lot. Lots of greenery there.

A couple of friends were posted for third group. That's somewhere around.. June. My aunt says they will most probably be able to skip NS.

Why?

June, Form 6 starts already. Not to mention some of them are thinking of joining the January or March intake for colleges. There'll be lots of evading, excuses, cat-and-mouse game, police catch thief, jail for school students and all.

Funny the way we plan things.

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I dedicate a special small part for our local political party here. PAS.

Seriously, Nik Aziz never fails to amuse me. :) I don't mean to be disrespectful.. but.. well..

Here's something he said before.

"Women should always sing lullaby to their husband. This is so that the husband will sleep well and wake up a happy man. A happy man will be a productive man."

Something like that. Can't remember his exact words. There were more strange and funny stuff from him, but I can't really remember.

And currently, the latest news about him. Again, my memory fails me. I can't remember the date when I saw it in the newspaper, but here goes :)

Nik Aziz - "We should consider employing more women who are not that good looking rather than employing women who are good looking. This is because pretty women tend to get married earlier and be tied down with family affairs. On the other hand, women who do not look so good can focus on their work more easily."

Hello? Does the word physical discrimination mean anything? You are a religious and political leader for Gods sake. Malaysia is a country where individual quality is what enables us to achieve success, not because we look ugly.

Note : Success here in this context means landing a job.

The next thing you know? Suggestions like 'Ugly men should not work because they are not happy as they do not have wives to satisfy their needs.'.. might abound anytime.

Am I glad Johor is not under PAS. Can't imagine life working in the office without attractive co-workers for occasional distraction xD

Again I say, Malaysia Boleh :D

New Update

Recently the world's been pretty much at unease. Mostly, people go nuts about sex related stuff.

Porn stars fighting with movie stars for post of governor...

Religious leaders fighting with people because he blamed women for being raped....

Stupid Malaysian Ministers saying women dress sexily even though they covered up themselves like a Chinese Bak Zhang ( rice dumpling )..

What else? No, I am not going to criticize anybody. A picture is worth a thousand words. Observe.Well... If men have the ability to give birth... that's gotta hurt man.

Well, if those leaders, religious or not.. are actually able to be impregnated or raped.. perhaps they might have a different view :)

Of course there is reason to their point of view. What they are suggesting is that when women are too revealing, they might cause any random guy to harden and ultimately lead to their kena rape. That is justified, and quite possible if you think about it.

But the thing is.. it does happen. But, the probability of that being the cause is extremely low.

Come on lar.. girls as young as 3 are sodomized and raped. WHAT FIGURE DO THEY HAVE???
God they don't even have boobs yet.

Let's just face it. Some guys are just perverted. And the fact that there are women who willingly get naked and do wicked stuff while being filmed does not help.

Fortunately for them, this is not the ancient Chinese Dynasty Era. They would be castrated immediately.

Say.. that's not a bad idea even now eh? If you're suggesting we give rapists a second chance, to be fair, is it possible for the victim to have a second chance?

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Serene once asked me..

"What is your dream?"

We all have dreams. Become a doctor to earn money while helping people, become this become that. Well, some maybe 'have sex before I die'. Hey include me!

So I gave her question some thought.

"I want to experience every single thing in the world."

Become a doctor. A beggar. A baker. Know every single thing in the world. Been there, done that. Rapist. Raped. Drug addict. Policeman. FBI CIA FUCK whatever whatever. yeah I mean literally everything. Everything ever imagined.

But unfortunately I have only a lifetime, and who knows it might not even be a hundred years. 17 of it is spent in Malaysia. Learning how stupid people can be at times. Learning how there is hope for humans after all when I come across angels without wings. Valuable experience is obtained. But never enough.

That is my dream. Is there a possibility that I might be reincarnated with my memories intact infinite times? I would be the all-knowing wise sage.

People would come.. " I caught this 100 foot godzilla last night at the pond.. "

I would laugh at them and say " Done that in my 3rd lifetime. "

I know. I am such a fucker.

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SPM issues. 4 papers down ( BM, BI, MM, SEJ ).

Gonna have a 'BBQ' party soon. Guess what will be the 'charcoal'?

You guessed right! Notes, books.. everything! Everything will be burned!

Probably not. I have so much of these notes, I probably can get RM 30 recycling them. Saves the Earth as well.

As for now, Pretty confident that I have 5 As ( including EST ) in hand now. But who knows, they might decide they don't like my I.C. number and decided to fuck up my results xD

Yes I know, its very easy to blame others.

Su Lynn's birthday was on 20th November. I wished her happy birthday. What she replied was

"You are definitely getting straight 1As for SPM because I am going to wish for that for my birthday."

Damnit, I am so aroused now.

SPM!!

Alright! SPM is finally here!! Time to kick balls!!

Wish me luck guys!! Damnit MCR is stirring me into a bloodfrenzy!! DEATH TO SPM!!

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Here's some interesting stuff for you to think about. While chatting on MSN with Anjulie.. we discovered something interesting.

As we all know, Amoebas are asexuals. They reproduce by splitting themselves into two.

So.. do we use the term 'divide' or 'multiply' in this case?

E.g. - Amoebas Multiply
- Amoebas Divide

Go figure xD

Screwed!

Professor Leslie is back again with helpful tips!

Today's topic is : Addmaths.

You know you are screwed in add maths when.....


1 ) You have absolutely no idea which chapter the question belongs to.

2 ) The question asks for a coordinate of a certain point. Somehow you end up with a locus equation. [ Simple answer for a coordinate would be ( 1 , 2 ). Simple answer for a locus equation would be x² + x + y² + y + 1 ( something like that larr.. )]

3 ) The answer you get is 20,000. But the answer given is 2.

4 ) You start binge-eating on Pringles Potato Chips®5 ) You bang your table uncontrollably.

6 ) You worry about your exam and you worry you might see this :

7 ) You spend half an hour on a single question ( no kidding, it happens )

8 ) You get 6 different answers for 6 attempts to solve a question

9 ) You get 8 different values for a CONSTANT

Symptoms above quite familiar to form 4, 5 and possibly 6 students? Get help now!!

Buy screwdrivers man!! They help you get screwed up in Mathematics faster!!

P/S : I found the screwdriver picture from a weird site. Its called Alibaba.com. The screwdrivers are 'Made in China'. lol

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My grandma's acting weird again.

This morning she just suddenly cried. When my aunt asked her why.. she was....

"I received a letter this morning. My father just died."

Well.. she's 87. For great-grandfather to be alive, he would have to be at least 105. Which unfortunately he did not live that long.

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I just bought a new book from the bookstore!

Its called 'The Inheritance Series', which consists of 2 books, Eragon and Eldest. Cost ( my brother ) RM100. Haha, finally managed to knock some money out of him for something I want.


Only 100 pages into the book and I am already hooked. Damn it man!! SPM SPM SPM!!!!!!!!!


I swear I am going to devour this book after SPM.

And the last time I went to Singapore ( that was in October, which was last month ) I saw posters everywhere advertising 'Eragon' the movie. WHY THE FUCK IS NOTHING GOING ON ABOUT ERAGON IN BATU PAHAT??????????????????????????????????

For people who genuinely loved epics like 'Lord of The Rings', 'Wheel of Time' and none of that Harry Potter shit, you might try this book. The beginning's a little like 'Wheel of Time - The Eye of the World ( book 1 )'.

Will give this book a proper rating after I have finished everything.

Hmm.. what have I read so far? Complete with my feelings for the book. ( Scale of 10 )

Lord of The Rings ( Include Hobbit and the 3 books ) - Well, what can I say? 9!!
Wheel of Time ( Book 1 -10 and 'New Spring' ) - Captivating. Overall 8½
Sophie's World ( My personal favourite of knowledge-based books ) - 8½
Old World trilogy ( Sabriel, Lirael, Abhorsen ) - Great book. 8
Dark Materials trilogy - Running out of complimentary words. 8
Sword of Truth ( 10 Books ) - Pretty good. Overall 7½
Emperor ( Fictional biography of Julius Caesar ) - Nice! 7½
Chronicles of Narnia ( all 7 books ) - 6
Harry Potter ( Bleh.. I don't like. I don't understand why its so popular. The first book was ok, but it began going downhill.. ) - 6½
Angels & Demons + Da Vinci Code ( it was fine.. ) - 6½

That's about the list of series as far as I can remember. I would like to proclaim myself a heavy reader.. there's an entire list of single-books-that-aren't-series that I can't remember their titles. Need some time to sort out my books. I love reading... it induces a mild orgasm as I flip through the pages. No serotonin though. Its rather a kind of unnatural orgasm-ic feeling xD Avid readers can understand what I mean.

Please note : The above mentioned score is given based on my own opinion. You have no obligation to start flaming me and going like 'Wh@+ Y0U $0 $+upEEd |-|@RrY P0++Er Ee$ $uCh a GrE@t B0ok.' You don't have to type like that. It annoys me. But that's the furthest it goes. A mere annoyance. A fly that I shall swat.

Look, not everyone likes something that is popular ok??

Back to Add Maths. I am so screwed xD

Da Picta

You guys know.. sometimes in life.. we just gotta do something stupid.

But what's cooler would be other people doing stupider stuff when you are doing stupid stuff.

High School life ( unless I have to go form 6 ) ended pretty well. The last day of school totally totalled me totalifically and made me totalitarian ( whatever the fuck is that ).

Well for starters.....

Most of the ex-Montfort boys got together and took this photo in my class. DON'T EVEN ASK ME WHAT AH BENG WAS GESTURING!!! And that blardy fook Elwin blocked my face!!

Guys for sale. No refund! Once broken considered sold. Buy 1 Free 1. If premium quality, 1 for the price of 2. If fucker quality, 12 for the price of 1. All virgins no problem ( I think.. )!


This would be the fucker gang.

Back row from left :
Seek Guan - The fucker who always acts damn cool. Quiet most of the time. But when he opens his mouth, you feel the sting. Damn diao.. I think I call him the 'Diao' Fucker.

Wee Kwong - Fucker who cannot smile. Ruins every picture with him in it.

Zhi Wei - What can I say? Fucker. Period.

Heng Leng - Bitch Fight expert even though he's a gay. Eeer.. I mean Guy.

Yee Yong - Chicken Little. He seriously looks like Chicken Little.

Bottom row from left :

Yours truly - I seriously don't know what to say for myself. I am such a fucker.

Christopher - Impossible. Everything impossible. Everything won't happen. Everything also 'I DIAO HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!' Conclusion : Impossible to fuck.

This is my Moral Ed Tuition Teacher, Mr Koh C.S!! Further introduction please refer to the photo below!

I missed taking photo with my other tuition teachers and some school teachers. Hope I get to meet them again. My tuition teachers are better than school teachers ( except moral ed. They are equally good ) But because I suck at being a moral person, I need tuition. Result? No improvement.

Well, why? You ask, is the smiley face in the laptop a fucker?

I also don't know. That smile just looks like it fits the definition of 'fucker' to me.

Oh gawrsh, how many words of 'fuck' did I use in this post?

Priceless.

More pictures coming. Takes a week to burn into a CD. Bloody hell, have to wait so long.

Though the next picture fest would be mostly of me with girls. Since all these with guys are already up... the nice ones anyway....

I won't be declaring hiatus. It is not me. It just ain't me. I shall do whatever I want. SPM come you may, LIM PEH SHALL BE PREPARED TO KICK YOUR BALLS ( if you even have them ).

Short post.. then again maybe no

Following the severe attacks by Julie and Aimee, I have been left emotionally scarred xD.

But then, I have never bothered. Because I am too lazy to be emotionally scarred.

I hereby say that, I am stopping sexual jokes for a while.

Admit it people, you laughed at the pear post below.

Alright, on to the post.

My grandmother said the cutest thing today.

Grandma : You go outside and keep watch for me ok?
Me : Wtf? What for??
Grandma : We came here illegally. Wait police come tell me then we run.
Me : Okay no problem. I go outside ar... *runs away*

She still thinks we are in Indonesia. And it didn't help that my aunt employed an Indonesian maid to look after her. Now my grandma thinks we're the ones who came to stay with the maid, and this house belongs to the maid.

Talk about role reversal.

SPM is coming. And I am not feeling anxious. At all.

Been watching school debates. Apparently, the lower six science one class ( 40 students. only around 9 boys and an idiot. wtf ) has been forced by Mr. Diva to participate in ELS's debate competition, which registered only 8 teams before they joined. Out of the 8, 2 pulled out. Leaving only 6. Pathetic. Simply pathetic.

And today, I watched the funniest debate match ever. Two lower six science one teams ( 6 girls and an idiot ). Zhi Wei was the adjudicator ( educator ).

You know why it's funny?

Both sides wanted to lose.

And they planned out the entire debate.

Such as when to POI, what to answer the POI, they read out word by word the script of their friend who debated before them including the mistakes which stood out very obviously....

And the idiot is the best part. He did not participate, because according to Mr. Diva, nobody wanted him. So, he was simply dumped as a reserve in a randomly chosen team.

So I kept yelling at him 'OI! YOUR TURN YOUR TURN!!' just to be an asshole to the idiot.

And the idiot says he wants to lose the first round. ( As if he could win even if he tried his best -__-" )

I know I am a jerk for calling him idiot.

But truth be told, an idiot is an idiot.

So, while the two teams were reading out what they rehearsed... this idiot was there telling me.

"I was the one who planned everything. Even the POIs also I think one. They planned out the entire thing with my help *brag brag brag*"

And while my juniors were training a new guy to play scrabble so that he could join the scrabble team, this idiot go kacau. He kept making moves for the new guy.

Here are the good tiles he ( the new guy ) had.

M O D A something something something

And what he did was.. he made the word 'mow'. ....3 1 4, 8 marks.

I took a look. Took the tiles back, and put AD elsewhere to form a 2x2 square, blocking around four openings and took a double word score for two words.

And I got more than 12 marks. I stared at him. He stared back.

Then he said to me.

"I forgot."

Mofo..

My Precious......

Just you and me tonight my baby....

The sight of you fills an emptiness in me. I am aroused whenever I set my eyes on you..

Yes, yes!!! I love the sight of your body! Your perfect curves.. your tender flesh... your smooth skin... you are oh so slender!

I shall savour every moment with you! *SLURP!*

I love it when I get to bathe you in clear crystal water...

You shall satisfy my deepest darkest desire now!!

Now come.......................

Let us proceed to perform a physical exerting activity amidst loud sounds of pleasure, moanings and groanings!

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My Pear.........................